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Friday, May 2, 2008

Mully-Grubbing

JEAN SAID:

Lord, I'm a mully-grubber. The other day I received two rejections for my writing. One in my mailbox, another in my email box. I KNOW that rejection letters are a normal part of being a writer. It seems I'd be used to them by now, doesn't it?

My reaction to them was predictable - mully-grubbing. In my head I know it's not a personal rejection. But my heart still takes it personally. I don't like that about myself. Anyway, I want to thank You for answering my unspoken prayer - the desire of my heart - to get over that kind of reaction.

In the middle of my mully-grubbing my phone rang. The person on the other end had a REAL problem, not a perceived problem like mine. A REAL crisis. A REAL reason to be asking You for strength, courage, and guidance. For an hour I listened and prayed. As she vented, my heart was able to put my own life back into perspective.

A couple of publishers couldn't use my manuscripts – so what! That is NOT a crisis. That is NOT justification for rolling around in self-pity.

Forgive me for being full of myself. Jesus, I want to be full of You.

GOD SAID:

Little One, day-by-day, inch-by-inch your heart is lining up with My heart. Your desires are slowly conforming to My desires for you. How long have you been saved now? Growing up to be like Me is a slow process, isn't it? You're slowly becoming more like Me, but you still have quite a way to go. Be patient with yourself.